Thursday Thirteen

Thirteen interesting ways to kill, harm, or maim your characters.

1) Fun with inanimate objects. Even the most mundane objects can end up being dangerous to your character. Take marbles for instance, lethal if projected from a wrist rocket, and the cause of more slips and slides into coffee tables, stoves and door frames than I can count.

2) Who reads directions? Directions, I knew they printed those things for a reason. Perhaps object A is not inserted correctly into slot B. *cough* Read into that what you will.

3) Run with scissors. Your mother has told you a thousand times not to run with scissors, but when has your character ever listened to anyone anyway?

4) The weather. A sure fire way to make sure your character is unprepared for the upcoming blizzard, tornado, or other wrath of nature is to make sure they watch the Weather Channel.

5) Play with test animals. They’re so cute and cuddly, they should be free from their mundane existence inside a cage. Oops. What were they testing on these critters again?

6) Singing. A sure way to torture your characters is for one of them to be tone-deaf and love to sing. I happen to have a nephew that tortures me frequently.

7) Deliverance and Hills Have Eyes. Need I say more?

8 ) Serial killers are overdone, but everyone loves random acts of violence. There can really never be too much.

9) There is nothing more amusing than a teacher trying to warn against something, does the exact same thing he warned the student against. Speaking from personal experience as my dad was a shop teacher. He is now missing the tip of one of his fingers. (He never lived that one down.)

10) Wrath of God. Deities are a great way to harm, maim and/or torture characters. They are immortal after all, they have to do something to amuse themselves.

11) The Supernatural. Ghost may not have substance, but that doesn’t mean they can’t hurt a character. Frights at the wrong time, and the truth can often be more damaging than say, running with scissors.

12) Vengeful lovers. Ouch. Lorena Bobbit is the first name that comes to mind.

13) Poisons. There are all sorts of poisons, and I’m not just talking about the kind you ingest, a poisoned mind is just as dangerous and often more fun.

Okay, that’s my Thursday Thirteen. I hope you enjoyed it.


Filed under Food for thought

12 responses to “Thursday Thirteen

  1. LOL – I don’t think I want to get on your wrong side! I enjoyed your list very much.

  2. LOL!! These are awesome!! 🙂 I especially love #6. Happy Thursday!

  3. Those poor, unsuspecting characters.

  4. LOL @ Lorena Bobit. She was on Oprah a couple of days ago. Her and Tanya Harding.

    Fun list! Happy T13

  5. Great list! And I must admit, my muse is furiously taking notes…especially the Singing method. Eek!

  6. Great list! Don’t forget using people’s allergies against them. I’ve read two books this month where cause of death was anaphylactic shock. In the first book, three characters were killed using their allergies to bees, shellfish and peanuts, and peanuts was used again in the book I finished reading last night. I can’t tell you how frequently I’ve been tortured by people bathing in their perfume or cologne, to which I am allergic.

  7. Sophia Parkwood

    Great List! My characters are actually shaking in their boots, my muse is having a field day with these. Happy Thursday!

  8. Ha, I especially like the Wrath of God. Bolts of lightning are waaaay underused in today’s literature!

  9. An excellent list! My favourite is #11.

  10. Jen

    LMAO!!!!! I’m so boring. I just use bullets and lasers.

  11. I so rarely off my characters. I guess I’m not mean enough. I maim them frequently, though. Does that count?

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