The I Don’t Wanna’s

I’m having an ‘I don’t wanna’ moment. My current WIP is close to being a solid draft. I know exactly what I need to write and correct to make it one step closer to my first round of betas/CPs (crit persons, aka. friends I torture regularly). BUT, I don’t wanna.

I’ve written this beginning at least four times. I get it almost done and realize I messed up, yet again, and it still needs fixing. No, this isn’t the, ‘it’s not good enough’ screw ups, this is the logic/story problem type of mess-ups. A delicate balance needs to be found between attraction and story and characters and plot. This makes my beginnings either strike true on the first or second try, or, like this time, a grumbling battle to find that balance.

I swear, I’ve put dents in my desk over this WIP in sheer frustration.

When I eventually find that beginning, that perfect balance, it’ll click. The rest will be down hill from there. Until that moment it’s an uphill battle with myself to force the words out, yet again.

Writing is hard. Remind me why I do it again? Oh yeah, I like it. 😕 Man, I must a closet masochist or something. I bet that in some dictionary somewhere under the definition of writer is the word masochist. If not, someone needs to write Webster and inform them of their gross negligence.

Well, back to the grindstone for me. Time to beat back the ‘I don’t wanna’s’ and try this again. But… I don’t wanna. Good thing I’m a masochist or I’d never get anything done.

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